Hi Philly time 8:25pm Wed nite May 9 - May 10

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Wed, May 9 6:44pm

B.
How ya doin'? I'm fine. Not great.. but OK.
Miss you .. I'm pretending not to hurt (living in
denial - LOL) - Heart you...

D.

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Wed, May 9 7:50pm


D,
I"m good was just out ---now i'm in to do h.w. and dooooooooo not wanna. but i know it's gonna get me into college. I'm sooooooo wanting to be out in this perfct weather. miss you too alot. OK? why are you hurting, i hope i didn't make you sad. i just had to tell you about the cj thing. I am not ubergay OK? i am nott girly, i am a BOI big time. I was playing baseball for fuck sake. ummm we were drinking again which is bad and i know its a school nite and it makes me all fucking horny and makes me hard. like rite now i'm sittin ghere with a hard on. that's bad, but i gotta do school stuff.

whats going on with you? huh? like are you teaching now? ummmmmmm...i cna't think at all so I better go. i miss you uncledavid. my dad hasn't written me in a long time and that makes me fell like shit alot. i mean what am I? i have my mo and andy and my friends, but my dad who knows i wanna know him isn't into it i dont think. Fuck. i'm not being such a good boy. so its ok if he doesnt wanna know me. rite?

i miss u
briannnnskatefuck

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Wed, May 9j 10:21 am

Brian,
I miss you too. Hey, don't let my little downer
attidude - get to you. You ONLY make me happy and feel
like I have a friend and caring boy (my uberboi-son
from another life), Brian P. "Sully" Flynn!

I am bit concerned about your drinking some nowadays.
You mentioned it once recently - did you drink this
afternoon before you got home?
I KNOW you don't want a lecture - but I care about
you so much and can't just KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT.

Getting high IS habit forming - you know - I really
don't need to tell you that. Nothing much good comes
from doing alcohol and other drugs) in the long run -
you know that for yourself. Right .. it feels good at
the time.. but it keeps taking more and more to keep
that good feeling going.
But like all of us, we look for ways to hide from the
hurt or pain or drudgery (like homework or school) or
from the desire of wanting something so badly or
wanting to change things or ourselves.
Who is buying or getting the alcohol - how do you get
it in the first place?

Give your dad a break - that's what you had said to
him in your first letter? You said you WOULD
understand if he never wrote back.. BUT HE DID write
back! So give him some time. You can always write
him, too. Eventually, he'll write back. He may not be
rich enough to just bring his family for a visit and
besides it might be a painful experience just
returning to America (which is not directly connected
to whether or not he wants to see you.)

Wish we could talk and I'd hug you and you squeeze
you tight...
Hey, you need to do something nice for somebody
else.. like Mother's Day is coming up .. talk to Andy
to see what you can do for her (maybe with his help).
I don't mean buying a gift.. there are other gifts --
liking helping at home, going to yoga (with her), or
writing her a song or making a card (with you original
drawings or poetry).
Get you mind off just yourself - hey, that's advice
that I need to take too.

Love,
D.

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Thursday, May 10, 2007 9:33:24 AM
Subject: Hi Philly time 8:25pm Wed nite

Bboi.sweetSk8er.ALLboybuffdude

Brian,
Labeling ourselves is just that -like most of the
above way I addressed you - they're only words to
describe you (us - as people) at one single point in
time and by just one and very limited glance.

I hope we are not defining ourselves ONLY by our
labels - maybe I'm doing that too much.

Anyway.. if you have time (too much school work) or
have the all clear (no one is watching).. I'm online
at my computer.

I miss talking to you - because you are one of the
most responsive, more positive, sexiest and funnier
people I meet day-to-day. No need to label you 'emo'
- you're beamo - in my book - beaming with joy and
love and sunshine!

See u later,

D